I saw my first toad of the season. While I was on my hands and knees cleaning out my garden, he hopped about an inch from my face. I screamed so loudly that I couldn’t speak for an hour. I am not afraid of toads or frogs or any critters for that matter, but I do tend to startle easily.
As a matter of fact, if the Seinfeld show was still on, I would probably write to the show and ask that they create a character called ‘the easily startled woman’. You know the type, constantly jumping or shrieking at the smallest thing. That’s me. I do that. I probably let out a gasp or a shriek or a scream at least three or four times a week. I could be in an office with 4 or 5 other people, everyone chatting, etc., and I happen to be doing something on the computer, and someone taps me on the shoulder and I let out a blood curdling scream. When my poor husband comes home from work, the first thing he is likely to hear is my startled shriek. The other day he proudly told me that he now had a Senators flag affixed to the window of his car. The next morning, when I went to get into my car and drive to work, I mis-took my husband’s Senators flag for a man. A man, who, for whatever reason, at 4:30 in the morning, was affixed to my husband’s car window. I think my scream woke up everyone within a two mile radius. I have no idea why I’m like this. I’m not really afraid of anything, just easily startled. Oh, wait a minute. I am afraid of clowns. But that’s about it.
Now that I get the Animal Planet TV channel, once I get past all the human-shows-that-maybe-have-an-animal-in-them, what I love the best are all the animal programs filmed in Africa. I am now utterly determined to one day go on an African safari. It must be absolutely amazing seeing lions and elephants and zebras in the wild! If you’re reading this and you went on an African safari , please let me know how it was, and if you would recommend the place you went. I have been doing a bit of research and so far all I’ve found are African safari tours that are about $1000 U.S. a night. Is that what they all cost? Sheeeshh!!! Its probably not a good idea to do a ‘discount’ African safari, but maybe something in the middle? I guess a cheap African safari would involve sightings of grassland poodles.
My American Idol prediction: Elliott is going to win. I thought Elliott had the best voice of anyone on the show right from the start, but I admit that I was a bit hesitant about him. The reason being, the judges all seem to emphasize the ‘whole package’. The looks , the personality, the ‘it’ factor, as well as the singing voice. At first I wasn’t sure that Elliott had all that, but now I really think he is going to win. Besides, why would I care what the American Idol judges are saying. Everyone on that set is so busy arguing with each other, American Idol has become like a night at the Bickersons.
Go Sens Go!!!! Didn’t you get quite a chuckle out of the family that was chastised for ringing their cowbells at one of the Sens-Lightning play-off games at Scotiabank Place? They were actually told by a security guard to stop clanging their bells. They were making too much noise!! Ha! The Senators organization did the right thing, and when they were apprised of the situation, they gave the cowbell-toting family some free tickets to the next game. I would love to take my big iron dinner triangle to the next game…you know the ones….ranchers use them to call people in for dinner! Don’t think there’s anything louder than one of those. I don’t know if they still sell them, but I bought my big iron dinner triangle at Lee Valley Tools. Just an idea for the next home game.
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
My Dog Loves Watching 'Deal or No Deal'!
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes had their baby. A girl. Now I can get on with my life.
Actually, no….I can’t move completely on…. Brad and Angelina have yet to bring their child into the world. In order to get away from the paparazzi, Brangelina has holed up in a remote African resort, where they will have their baby. The couple chose this spot so they will be protected by lions, cheetahs, elephants, charging rhinos, and angry ground squirrels. I guess they don’t have an alarm system back home.
Every time I tell someone that my dog Hudson loves to watch tv, I usually get a strange look. But since this is in writing, I will just have to envision the strange look from anyone reading this. Unless, of course, your dog watches tv too. Then you know what its like to be on the receiving end of a strange glare. My dog Hudson especially likes any tv shows that feature Shania Twain. But lately, Hudson has really become quite fond of ‘Deal Or No Deal’. We enjoy sitting together on the couch watching this game show, and when the studio audience shouts ‘NO DEAL!! NO DEAL!!, Hudson’s ears always really perk up for some reason. The only thing I can figure, is that Hudson thinks these people are shouting ‘NO HEEL’!! NO HEEL!!! Which, of course, is a dog’s dream come true.
Unless it pours rain this weekend, I plan to make a visit to the ‘Big Sky Animal Sanctuary’ near Kemptville. Owner Andy Parent takes in unwanted animals and currently has over 170 in his care, from dogs to horses and goats. I’ve mentioned this before, but its worth repeating, its never too early to write something down on your calendar. July 8th, Big Sky Animal Sanctuary, the first ever ‘WOOFSTOCK”, hosted by yours truly. This is going to be a huge ‘Woodstock’’ themed fundraiser out on the farm and a great day for the whole family. Wear your hippie clothes , and join ‘Grateful Dog’, ‘Joe Cocker Spaniel’…’Jefferson Airedale’…and any other hippie themes we can think of. We have a link to the Big Sky Animal Sanctuary on this website’s ‘pet friendly’ section. And of course, anything you can donate to the cause would be fantastic.
At this time of year, I feel so lucky to be working in the Byward Market. Having our radio station right in the midst of all the action is great year-round, but right now, the street vendors are coming back and I can’t resist buying their stuff. It seems that each day, by time I get back to my car, I have bags stuffed with apples, green peppers, bananas, lettuce, berries, I buy it all. Something about buying fruits and vegetables from the street. Then, I bring it all home, put it in the fridge, and completely forget its there. And, a week later, I throw it all out. Aaahhh… I just love the street vendors!
Actually, no….I can’t move completely on…. Brad and Angelina have yet to bring their child into the world. In order to get away from the paparazzi, Brangelina has holed up in a remote African resort, where they will have their baby. The couple chose this spot so they will be protected by lions, cheetahs, elephants, charging rhinos, and angry ground squirrels. I guess they don’t have an alarm system back home.
Every time I tell someone that my dog Hudson loves to watch tv, I usually get a strange look. But since this is in writing, I will just have to envision the strange look from anyone reading this. Unless, of course, your dog watches tv too. Then you know what its like to be on the receiving end of a strange glare. My dog Hudson especially likes any tv shows that feature Shania Twain. But lately, Hudson has really become quite fond of ‘Deal Or No Deal’. We enjoy sitting together on the couch watching this game show, and when the studio audience shouts ‘NO DEAL!! NO DEAL!!, Hudson’s ears always really perk up for some reason. The only thing I can figure, is that Hudson thinks these people are shouting ‘NO HEEL’!! NO HEEL!!! Which, of course, is a dog’s dream come true.
Unless it pours rain this weekend, I plan to make a visit to the ‘Big Sky Animal Sanctuary’ near Kemptville. Owner Andy Parent takes in unwanted animals and currently has over 170 in his care, from dogs to horses and goats. I’ve mentioned this before, but its worth repeating, its never too early to write something down on your calendar. July 8th, Big Sky Animal Sanctuary, the first ever ‘WOOFSTOCK”, hosted by yours truly. This is going to be a huge ‘Woodstock’’ themed fundraiser out on the farm and a great day for the whole family. Wear your hippie clothes , and join ‘Grateful Dog’, ‘Joe Cocker Spaniel’…’Jefferson Airedale’…and any other hippie themes we can think of. We have a link to the Big Sky Animal Sanctuary on this website’s ‘pet friendly’ section. And of course, anything you can donate to the cause would be fantastic.
At this time of year, I feel so lucky to be working in the Byward Market. Having our radio station right in the midst of all the action is great year-round, but right now, the street vendors are coming back and I can’t resist buying their stuff. It seems that each day, by time I get back to my car, I have bags stuffed with apples, green peppers, bananas, lettuce, berries, I buy it all. Something about buying fruits and vegetables from the street. Then, I bring it all home, put it in the fridge, and completely forget its there. And, a week later, I throw it all out. Aaahhh… I just love the street vendors!
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Moths ate my Rolling Stones Shirt
Its about that time of year, when students are looking for summer jobs. I came across a story the other day called ‘First Jobs of the Rich and Famous’. Did you know that Bill Murray used to sell chestnuts outside a grocery store? Robin Williams was a street mime (not too hard to believe), Jerry Seinfeld sold light bulbs over the phone….Madonna worked behind the counter at Dunkin’ Donuts….Jennifer Aniston was a waitress…Demi Moore worked at a debt collection agency…and David Lee Roth emptied bedpans as a hospital orderly. So, there you go! Good luck with that summer job, and remember, David Lee Roth emptied bedpans.
I’m still needing some help with my vole problem. Once the snow melted off my front lawn, I was quite surprised to find little ‘hills of dirt’ scattered everywhere. If you can picture little brown ski hills about six to eight inches high, that’s what I have all over my lawn. I did some research and it looks like I have an entire vole network under my lawn, but I don’t know how to get rid of them. Naturally I don’t want the voles to be hurt in any way. I just want them to find somewhere else to built their transit system. Maybe if I blast Michael Bolton’s new CD across the yard, that’ll do it.
I wish Manhatten was only a short drive away! Because I would definitely get down there this week, for the Elton John clothing sale! Elton John has set up shop at Rockefeller Centre and he’s selling 10,000 pieces of his own clothing to raise money for his Aids Foundation. There’s everything from bright orange blazers to Adidas track suits and ball caps, prices are anywhere from $10.00 to $10,000! I think it would be super cool to walk around in a lime green sweater with matching boa that once belonged to Elton John.
Crocuses? Croci? Which one is correct? Those little purple flowers that are coming up right now. It seems I get into this debate every year at this time. What’s the plural of crocus? Usually, before I get the right answer, the crocuses, or croci, are gone.
Bob’s ‘Deal or No Deal’ has started, with the chance for someone to win $10,000 each morning on Bob FM. I can’t believe how nervous I get when we play this game, not only because there’s big money on the line, but you never know how far someone is willing to go. On the tv show, Deal or No Deal, the audience is always shouting ‘NO DEAL”! Of course they’re going to shout “NO DEAL”, they have nothing to lose! On our radio version, the contestant has to decide for themselves whether they want to accept the banker’s deal or chance it all for $10,000. Anyone can play, but you have to register first on this website. Its crazy fun, but I have to warn you, a really good anti-perspirant is very much required.
In the department of ‘things that make you shake your head’… About a month ago, I bought a 50 pound bag of sunflower seed for my birdfeeder. When I opened the bag, a bunch of small moths flew out into my living room, my bedroom, some landed on the bathroom mirror, others headed for the tv room in the basement. I recognized these moths as clothes-eating moths. So, here we are, a month later, and the moths seem to have finally disappeared. The other day, I was going to a party and I thought I’d wear my favourite shirt. A green shirt that I was given to wear by the wardrobe lady at last summer’s Rolling Stones video shoot (another story altogether). I pulled it out of the closet and ….’lo and behold’….now I knew what happened to all those moths!! They had gorged themselves on my Rolling Stones shirt. I checked every other piece of clothing I own, and nothing. No holes, no damage. The moths had just eaten one shirt. My favourite shirt. How did they know?! Why couldn’t the moths have eaten my shiny pink shirt with the big lapel?
I’m still needing some help with my vole problem. Once the snow melted off my front lawn, I was quite surprised to find little ‘hills of dirt’ scattered everywhere. If you can picture little brown ski hills about six to eight inches high, that’s what I have all over my lawn. I did some research and it looks like I have an entire vole network under my lawn, but I don’t know how to get rid of them. Naturally I don’t want the voles to be hurt in any way. I just want them to find somewhere else to built their transit system. Maybe if I blast Michael Bolton’s new CD across the yard, that’ll do it.
I wish Manhatten was only a short drive away! Because I would definitely get down there this week, for the Elton John clothing sale! Elton John has set up shop at Rockefeller Centre and he’s selling 10,000 pieces of his own clothing to raise money for his Aids Foundation. There’s everything from bright orange blazers to Adidas track suits and ball caps, prices are anywhere from $10.00 to $10,000! I think it would be super cool to walk around in a lime green sweater with matching boa that once belonged to Elton John.
Crocuses? Croci? Which one is correct? Those little purple flowers that are coming up right now. It seems I get into this debate every year at this time. What’s the plural of crocus? Usually, before I get the right answer, the crocuses, or croci, are gone.
Bob’s ‘Deal or No Deal’ has started, with the chance for someone to win $10,000 each morning on Bob FM. I can’t believe how nervous I get when we play this game, not only because there’s big money on the line, but you never know how far someone is willing to go. On the tv show, Deal or No Deal, the audience is always shouting ‘NO DEAL”! Of course they’re going to shout “NO DEAL”, they have nothing to lose! On our radio version, the contestant has to decide for themselves whether they want to accept the banker’s deal or chance it all for $10,000. Anyone can play, but you have to register first on this website. Its crazy fun, but I have to warn you, a really good anti-perspirant is very much required.
In the department of ‘things that make you shake your head’… About a month ago, I bought a 50 pound bag of sunflower seed for my birdfeeder. When I opened the bag, a bunch of small moths flew out into my living room, my bedroom, some landed on the bathroom mirror, others headed for the tv room in the basement. I recognized these moths as clothes-eating moths. So, here we are, a month later, and the moths seem to have finally disappeared. The other day, I was going to a party and I thought I’d wear my favourite shirt. A green shirt that I was given to wear by the wardrobe lady at last summer’s Rolling Stones video shoot (another story altogether). I pulled it out of the closet and ….’lo and behold’….now I knew what happened to all those moths!! They had gorged themselves on my Rolling Stones shirt. I checked every other piece of clothing I own, and nothing. No holes, no damage. The moths had just eaten one shirt. My favourite shirt. How did they know?! Why couldn’t the moths have eaten my shiny pink shirt with the big lapel?
Monday, April 03, 2006
I Will Get Fooled Again
I let out a ‘GASP’ unlike any gasp I’ve ever released before!! Why the gargantuan ‘gasp’?! I was checking my favourite Bruce Springsteen website, www.backstreets.com, for no reason in particular, when I saw the headline on the website: Its Bruce Springsteen week on American Idol! There was a photo of Bruce arm-in-arm with Paula Abdul, next to a smiling Randy and Simon….and another photo of Bruce playing guitar next to Idol finalist Chris Daughtry. Horrified, I continued reading the story….. Bruce Springsteen songs would be featured on this Wednesday’s ‘American Idol’, and there was a list of which Bruce songs the contestants would sing. My heart was in my throat!!! How could The Boss do this? Why would he do it!!!! He doesn’t need to do it!!! Uuughhhh…. Not since the Rolling Stones premiered their video for ‘Streets of Love’ on a daytime soap opera have I been so incensed at ‘marketing gone wrong’. Bruce Springsteen week on American Idol. It was enough to make me bawl like a baby. But then I saw the date on the top of the story. April 1st, 2006. April Fools Day. Sheesh. Fished in by my own fan site! Nice to know I can turn beet red even when I’m the only one home.
Speaking of April Fools Day, check out the website www.museumofhoaxes.com. They list the top 100 April Fools jokes of all time. Some of my favourites include ‘Smell-o-vision’, when the BBC tv network convinced tv viewers that new technology meant you could actually smell what you were watching on tv. There was also Burger King’s ‘left-handed Whopper’ commercial, causing left-handed people to rush to the fast food restaurant for a burger especially for them. And of course, what April Fools Day should pass without some mention of ‘killer bees’. They should arrive here any day now.
I love the month of April, the change of seasons, all that stuff, but wow….is it ever muddy at my place! I keep a Swiffer right by the door because every time my three dogs return from the yard, I have 12 paws dipped in mud, which translates into about 120 mud prints on my floor. Yes, I know I can ask all my dogs to ‘sit’ and ‘stay’ on the welcome mat, then I can take a rag and wipe all of their paws before they enter the house. The problem is, my dogs have no training in them whatsoever. I prefer to let them learn things on their own. For example, my dog Hudson has learned that if he pulls back the bedspread on the spare room bed, its much more comfortable to sleep under the covers. He taught himself that one.
Thank you to Luc Lemay, owner of John’s Street Sweepers, for giving JR the dream experience of a lifetime. A ride in a street sweeper. It really is all about the simple things in life, isn’t it?
I plan to get my bike out of the shed this week. It’s a tough bike, I know that because I have ridden it straight into a wooden fence at full speed, and its also survived a summersault into a roadway ditch. I can really see why helmets are now mandatory.
Speaking of April Fools Day, check out the website www.museumofhoaxes.com. They list the top 100 April Fools jokes of all time. Some of my favourites include ‘Smell-o-vision’, when the BBC tv network convinced tv viewers that new technology meant you could actually smell what you were watching on tv. There was also Burger King’s ‘left-handed Whopper’ commercial, causing left-handed people to rush to the fast food restaurant for a burger especially for them. And of course, what April Fools Day should pass without some mention of ‘killer bees’. They should arrive here any day now.
I love the month of April, the change of seasons, all that stuff, but wow….is it ever muddy at my place! I keep a Swiffer right by the door because every time my three dogs return from the yard, I have 12 paws dipped in mud, which translates into about 120 mud prints on my floor. Yes, I know I can ask all my dogs to ‘sit’ and ‘stay’ on the welcome mat, then I can take a rag and wipe all of their paws before they enter the house. The problem is, my dogs have no training in them whatsoever. I prefer to let them learn things on their own. For example, my dog Hudson has learned that if he pulls back the bedspread on the spare room bed, its much more comfortable to sleep under the covers. He taught himself that one.
Thank you to Luc Lemay, owner of John’s Street Sweepers, for giving JR the dream experience of a lifetime. A ride in a street sweeper. It really is all about the simple things in life, isn’t it?
I plan to get my bike out of the shed this week. It’s a tough bike, I know that because I have ridden it straight into a wooden fence at full speed, and its also survived a summersault into a roadway ditch. I can really see why helmets are now mandatory.
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