Monday, May 30, 2005

Anyone for a Fantasy Foursome?

Congratulations to all the runners who helped to raise over half a million dollars for the Ottawa Hospital during ‘National Capital Race Weekend’! And congratulations to U of O student Shauna Burke for climbing Mount Everest this past weekend! Truly inspired, today I took the stairs instead of the elevator, up to the third floor!

Canadian Idol is back! I was reading some poll last week that asked ‘who would you like to have pump your gas’? And first-time Canadian Idol winner Ryan Malcolm was the number 2 gas pumper, our very own Prime Minister being number one. I have no idea what that means.

We’re looking forward to the responses in our ‘Fathers Day Fantasy Foursome’ contest with Bayshore Shopping Centre. We need your ultimate fantasy foursome for a game of golf. Could be...lets see....Carmen Electra, David Suzuki, Billy Idol, and you. Or...hmmm....Paris Hilton, Paul Newman, Homer Simpson, and you. Or you and Bono, Eugene Levy, Madonna, and Albert Einstein. The more you use your imagination and convince JR and me that your foursome would be the most fun on the golf course, the better your chance at winning the grand prize: A Father’s Day round of golf for 32 people at the Marshes Golf Course, and dinner at Moxies - compliments of Bayshore Shopping Centre! My fantasy foursome includes Lassie.

I’d like to apologize to the woman behind me line at the grocery store check out. She went home without her big beautiful tomatoes and baby spinach. Because somehow it all came home with me. But I did check my bill, and yes I did pay for that lady’s tomatoes and spinach. Next time this happens I hope I accidentally pay for and get someone else’s Hagen Daz ice cream.

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Who's Got Tickets?

Ok, Ok...so Bo didn’t win American Idol. Obviously rockers don’t buy into that ‘text messaging’ thing. That’s probably why he lost.

I’m starting to think, that when I was born, some super power bigger than me said, ‘and this person here, who was just born, shall have much difficulty buying concert tickets, especially the year 2005’. Like everyone else, I’ve been so excited and impressed by all the concerts coming right here to Ottawa! U2 - wow!! I couldn’t get tickets to that one, nope. I signed up for the ‘pre-sale’ for Coldplay in Montreal, and Coldplay sent me back an e-mail saying that I was not chosen for the pre-sale at this time. Then I signed up for the Pearl Jam pre-sale, and Pearl Jam wouldn’t accept my email address. For the Rolling Stones, I let my husband handle it. He paid $100 for the pre-sale rights, and when the day came, he was offered a pair of tickets in the last row at the far end of the stadium, so he didn’t go for them, because he was sure something better would come up. After all, this was the pre-sale! Nope! No tickets for the Stones. I suppose I’m whining a bit. Sorry about that. I don’t mean to. Besides, there’s a good chance I’ll win a bet with JR this weekend, and I’ll win a pair of his U2 tickets. If the Stones Ottawa show sells out by midnight Saturday (my prediction), I win a pair of JR’s U2 tickets. If the Stones don’t sell out by midnight Saturday, I have to bring my manual push mower over to his house in Kanata and cut his lawn. I really hope I don’t have to do this.

My basement is sinking. Not the whole basement, just one side of the room that holds my 6 foot long aquarium that has five goldfish in it. So, this weekend there may be men in my house lifting up the floor, so the aquarium is going to have to go outside in the backyard for a while, fish and all. Seeing as how its also mosquito breeding season, I figure my 6 foot aquarium will be perfect for about a million mosquito larvae. I’ll let you know what happens once the aquarium is back in the house. I may have to go outside to escape the mosquitoes in the house. So, what’s up for your weekend?

Bye for now!

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

BOB has all the Stones!

Ottawa Citizen film critic Jay Stone is back in the real world after spending the last 2 weeks at the Cannes Film Festival. I particularly enjoy the segment around 8:40 each Friday on Bob FM’s ‘the Morning After’ when Jay gives his latest film review. But there’s something extra special when you’re talking to Jay by phone, and he’s standing on his balcony overlooking semi-clad stars on the Riviera, and he has a pair of binoculars, just in case an A-lister like Angelina Jolie happens by. It doesn’t get any more real than that. Wonder if Jay picked up a couple of Cannes t-shirts for folks back home.

Word is out about the support acts for the Stones show at Lansdowne, August 28th. Here in town, we will enjoy Les Trois Accords, and Our Lady Peace, before the Stones take to the stage. And remember, if you get shut out from buying any tickets, the show is taking place during the Ex, so I suggest you ride the roller coaster or the double ferris wheel. At least on the double ferris wheel, sometimes it gets stuck at the top, so you’ll get an extra long look at Mick and Keith.

Went to Yuk Yuks the other night, and laughed my head off. I had a pretty bad cold and so my laugh ended up sounding like very loud dry choking. There were five comics on the bill, including Ottawa’s Rick Currie, very talented guy. When he takes his dog camping, his dog sits on a rock overlooking the lake, and barks at his own echo. I think I myself have done this once or twice.

Its the season for golf tournaments. Although I don’t golf, I love the clothes. If you’re a golfer, call the Humane Society right now at 725-3166, or get all the info at www.ottawahumane.ca! I will be at the ‘Fore the Animals’ Golf Tourney, Thursday June 9th at gorgeous Pakenham Highlands Golf Club. This is one of those tournaments where everyone has a lot of laughs and no one goes home empty handed. Including me. Three years ago during the tourney prize auction, I was the highest bidder on a will. Thanks to the Humane Society Golf Tournament, I now have a legal document that will officially pass along all my debts to my family! It really is a fun time so please join us - check out the website for details!

Thursday, May 19, 2005

One more night of tv, then I'm gettin' outside!

Go, Bo, go! Bo Bice on American Idol has made it to the final two, and I want him to win, but I have mixed feelings about it. If he wins, thats great for his career. Or is it? Because the minute an American Idol is chosen, they get handed the worst piece of shlock song and they have to go out and belt it out as the credits roll. I’m having trouble seeing Bo the rocker sing that inevitable schmaltz tune on stage, much less have to release it as his first single. All that aside, my vote is for Bo! I just hope his first single doesn’t end up in a tv commercial for womens products.

Yahoo! Its the first long weekend of unofficial summer. The tulip festival concert line-up is jammed all weekend long. I saw the Sadies the other night at Majors Hill Park and you know, for my money, you just can’t beat some of the lyrics that come out of alt-country bands. Here’s how one song started: “I saw two three-legged dogs that reminded me of you because you’re six feet underground’. If you’re checking out some of the bands this weekend, whatever you do, don’t stand in front of someone who’s plunked down their lawn chair for the night. I speak from experience! Sheesh.

Its cottage season once again! Remember to practice safe boating. Make sure your boat has a flashlight, a rope, some flares and a horn. And if you’re waterskiing, always ensure you have a spotter in the boat to keep their eye on the skier. And one more piece of advice: do not stuff an old pair of boots and pants and a shirt with newspaper to create a human form topped off with a basketball for a head and a wig and a baseball cap , then place this figure in the back of your boat to look like a spotter. Because one day, you will get a fine for doing that. Don’t ask me how I know.

Have an awesome long weekend

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Black Crowes, Horses and One Mother Spider

Saw the ‘Black Crowes’ in Montreal this past weekend, and here is my review: if you like big time jammin’, this is a band you wanna see. Every time they launched into a song that I knew, oh, let’s say, ‘Remedy’ or ‘Hard to Handle’...the song would then morph into a 20 minute jam, with big guitar solo’s and even the odd drum solo. Lead singer Chris Robinson was fun to watch, but I didn’t get enough of him. He would kinda sway and groove in the background while his guitarist brother Rich and the rest of the band would play and play and play, and by the time Chris grabbed the mike to sing again, I’d pretty well forgotten which song it was to begin with. I think the musicians in the crowd probably loved the show. Since the only musical instrument I ever mastered was the ‘triangle’, and there was no ‘triangle’ player in the Black Crowes, I kinda left wanting more in the singing department. But maybe thats just me. And any other triangle players in the crowd.

Controversy is rearing its head once again in the byward market. One of the restaurant owners is complaining about the horse and carriage rides that pick up tourists outside his establishment. Says the smell of the horses is not appetizing, and that customers are driven away. To that I say ‘neigh’! The horses and carriages add color and fun to the market, and the tourists love it. Besides, I watch these guys all the time and they make the horses wear some kind of horsey ‘Depends’, which I’m sure is embarrassing for the horse, but it definitely minimizes the you-know-what. Lets keep the horses in the market! Now, the mime artists, thats another story.

Speaking of adding color to our city, how do you feel about the giant spider sculpture outside the National Gallery? I think its fantastic. People who don’t like spiders are not crazy about it, which I guess is understandable. A few years back, I started to see spiders in a whole new light, thanks to ‘Far Side’ cartoons. Far Side creator Gary Larsen’s take on spiders was always hysterical. If you’re afraid of spiders, get a Far Side cartoon book. Then go down to the National Gallery and get your picture taken beside the mother of them all. No more spider phobia! Now if I could just take care of my ‘clown’ phobia.

One final note, I’d like to pass along best wishes to all you Star Wars fans. With the new movie out this week, it must be like Christmas! Remember, you are being counted on to save the lagging movie industry. Try to see Revenge of the Sith eight or nine times, instead of the usual three or four. That way movie producers will still have money to make movies with Will Ferrell and Ben Stiller.

Bye for now!

Thursday, May 12, 2005

You Know You're An Ottawan When........

Sandy’s Blog
May 12, 2005


On the morning show, we stumbled on a way to determine whether or not someone has lived in Ottawa all their life. Ask that person if he/she has ever heard of ‘Jimmy Knox and Thee Group’, and the song, ‘Its a Long Way Home’. If they have, they are an ‘Ottawan, born and raised’. I ran into the one and only Jimmy Knox in a byward market establishment and he seemed genuinely surprised that I knew his name and the title of his big, albeit ‘regional’ late 70’s hit. When we chatted about him , and his song ‘Its a Long Way Home’ on the air, listeners called to sing the song. And the only ones that knew it were people who have lived here their entire lives. Aha!! I knew that one day I would be rewarded for living in Ottawa this long. I hope this story doesn’t divide the city.

Its the start of the live music line-up at the Tulip Festival! The first thing I do when I get to Majors Hill Park is stop by that giant lemon on wheels for some lemon-ade. Then I join the crowd patiently waiting for the first band to come out on stage. I usually stand near the VIP section. I figure, since these people are VIP’s, they must have the best spot. Usually its an area surrounded by a white picket fence. Kinda like a VIP corral. All the VIP’s are inside the VIP corral, and we are just outside the VIP corral. Other than that, the vantage point is the same. Can’t wait!

Hope you can join us at ‘Dogmania’ this Saturday! Its a day-long fundraiser for B.A.R.K (www.bark-Ottawa.com) , Canines for a Cause, and Cystic Fibrosis. Bring your dog! There will be contests, entertainment, prizes, and animal intuitive Elizabeth Wright will read your dog’s mind!! Its at the Aberdeen Pavilion, Lansdowne Park, Saturday from 10 to 5.
For more info check www.dogmania.org.
I will be there around 11 to judge some contests, including dog/owner lookalike. Dalmations and their owners who wear polka dots always seem to win this one. Admission to Dogmania is whatever donation you can make!

Thanks to Mike Hillary from Hillary Cleaners for his constant generosity. Mike is now offering to dry clean all of the Rolling Stones clothing when they are in town. A couple of months back he offered to do the same with the members of U2. No word on whether Mike’s offer has been extended to Loverboy.

Bye for now!

Monday, May 09, 2005

Signs, signs, everywhere are signs

May 9, 2005


The warm weather is finally here and for me, that means I’m back in the garden. And in my neighbourhood, it also means the black flies are back. The other day while digging up everything that died over the winter, I swallowed two black flies. Mmmm...taste like chicken!

I recently checked in with one of my favourite websites, www.weeklyworldnews.com. Not only do they keep us up to date with the whereabouts of ‘Bat Boy’, in the last installment they featured the world’s funniest store slogans. Here are some: On a sign outside a tire shop: ‘Invite us to your next blowout’. The slogan for a New York gynecologist: ‘Dr Jones, at your cervix’. A radiator repair shop in Ohio: ‘ this is a great place to take a leak’. And my personal favourite, this sign outside a sex change surgeon’s office in Illinois: ‘Eat, Drink and Be Mary’. If you see any weird signs, let me know!

Have you been watching ‘The American Race’? This season, I don’t care who wins, as long as its not Rob and Amber. How can Rob go into an airport anywhere in the world and tell the ticket agent not to sell flights to the other contestants? And he seems to get away with it! This couple has a horse-shoe sticking out where the sun don’t shine. I half expect that Rob and Amber could actually saunter up to the month-old line-up of Star Wars fans waiting to see ‘Revenge of the Sith’ next week, and somehow get first in line.

Not sure how I feel about ‘the Gleibermans’ possible return to the Ottawa Renegades organization. JR’s buddy spotted Lonnie Gleiberman the other day in downtown Ottawa wearing a suit, riding his 10 speed bike with a back-pack on. Not sure what that says about a potential owner of our football team. I hope the Renegades work it all out, because I would have nowhere to go with my big red horn and giant foam finger.

Bye for now!

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Dreams and Stones

I got an e-mail from Stephanie, and it made me laugh out loud. She wanted to know if we have ever considered doing a morning show about ‘dream interpretation’. Reason being, she dreamt that half of her teeth were falling out and I was trying to run her over in my SUV. Sheesh. I too gotta know what this means! If there’s a Sigmund Freud amongst us, please e-mail me back! I rarely remember my dreams. Not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. But I do remember one dream I had, I was dressed as a Pirate sitting in the stands at Rideau Carleton Raceway, where the Pope was giving a speech. How about that one.

Keep those drink recipes coming! JR and I are entered into the Chateau Laurier media cocktail competition coming up Thursday May 12th. I don’t think I can enter my favourite beer brand. Thank you to Michelle for the ‘nuclear anti-freeze’ recipe, that involves Blue Caracao and orange juice, the end result being a drink thats nuclear green. How’d you like to wake up in the morning after a night of those? Thanks for that Michelle!

Happy Mothers Day! Each year the great debate comes up: of course husbands need to acknowledge their own Moms. But if a man’s wife is also a mom, does he need to buy her a gift too? I say yes. What do you say?

If there was any doubt that the Rolling Stones are coming to Ottawa later this summer, I think I can pass along this little tidbit: Ottawa media has been invited to a news conference on Tuesday, for a simulcast of the Rolling Stones news conference in New York City. Gee..... I wonder why we were invited to this news conference.....hmmmmm..... I’m not a betting woman but I’d say its a good idea to start saving up for those $300 Stones tickets.......

Bye for now!

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

U2 In Vancouver & Cocktails

Wow! Congrats again to Belinda Batten and her hubby Dave, winners in our ‘see U2 in Vancouver’ contest. What an amazing show! Definitely one of the best concert experiences I’ve ever had. Do whatever you have to do to be at U2 in Ottawa. Of course, when we get closer to the November date at the Corel Centre, keep listening to BOB FM for tickets. Thats probably a better option than paying a scalper $310 for a ticket, which a certain someone paid to catch U2’s second Vancouver show. That left me with no money for a $45 concert t-shirt. At the show, Bono encouraged people to call our PM Paul Martin and urge him to re-consider Canada’s stance on relief of third world debt, and he flashed the PM’s phone number. Problem was, the Ottawa area code for the PM was flashed on the video screen as ‘615’. Wonder who got all those phone calls from passionate U2 fans!

Thanks to Westjet for the great flight back to Vancouver. All passengers were treated to back-to-back episodes of the Simpsons! It was w-a-y better than having ‘Fat Albert’ for an in-flight movie.

If you’re planning some shopping at Billings Bridge Plaza this week, before you leave your house make sure to dig up your favourite pet photos. For a $5.00 donation, you can enter your pet’s photo at Sooter’s Photography Billings Bridge, with all proceeds going to the Humane Society. This Saturday May 7th, I will be judging the photos. Enter your dog, your cat, your ferret, your goldfish. I’m personally rather partial to photos of dogs sitting in the driver’s seat of a car. Just a hint.

Zoe’s second annual cocktail competition at the Chateau Laurier is coming up next Thursday May 12th, and JR and I have been invited to come up with some kind of concoction. We are entered into the media competition and need your help! If you have a fabulous drink recipe please pass it along. In order to win this contest, I think I have to abandon what I usually do, which is pick up one of those giant supermarket tubs of frozen slush and add 40 ounces of something to it. Send drink recipes here! Bonus points if the drink requires a little umbrella.

Bye for now!
sandy