June 24, 2005
The count-down is on! Just a few days before the kids are outta school! Not having any kids, I miss out on the ultimate glee that kids feel at this time of year. I remember the last day of school, and I’m not sure if this holds true today, but somehow I always had the kind of teacher who gave us a test on the very last morning before we were finally let out for the summer. I spent the whole time starting out the class window. The first thing I did when I finally got out of school was catch a big jar of bees or frogs. Somehow they always escaped. Growing up on Alta Vista Drive, I’m pretty sure we had the only backyard that was filled with frogs the entire summer. Never went to camp but my two brothers, Paul and Bob did. When my brother Paul was at camp he mailed a letter back to my parents that said, ‘hi. We’re ok, food is ok. Bob threw up. Love, Paul’.
Its cottage squatter time, too. This is JR’s term for people who don’t have a cottage but show up unexpected at other people’s cottages each weekend with 6 hot dogs and a 6 pack of Wildcat beer. Then, come Sunday night, they leave with their 6-pack of Wildcat.
I was driving down the Queensway the other day behind a Harley that had one of those side-cars. In the side car was a dog. Ears flapping, lips flapping, he looked pretty cool. He even seemed to be snickering at the dog next to him in the front seat of a mini van. Don’t know where you buy a motorcycle helmet for a dog, but this dog had one.
It wouldn’t be an Ottawa summer without the return of the great debate. People who attend summer music festivals are once again divided into two groups: those who stand and those who bring lawn chairs. I usually get to a music festival early and stand. Its not long before someone in a lawn chair is shouting at me to get out of the way. Where do you stand, er, or sit, on this issue? I suggest that people who bring chairs don’t want to stand because its hard on their legs. So, here’s my solution: festival organizers rig up rows and rows of ‘Jolly Jumpers’. You know those contraptions that are hooked up to doorways, there’s a seat and you plunk your infant into it. The kid is in a standing position, but he’s not using any leg muscles to stand. So the people who go to Bluesfest can leave their chairs at home, climb into a jolly jumper, and everyone’s happy. What do you think?
